I watched Viswaroopam a couple of days back and seriously regret the decision. I wasted my money and time and also sacrificed my sleep for the night show.
What the hell was this movie about? What was the story? How crappier can the screenplay be?
A scene by scene analysis? No way!!!! So here are the high (or should I say 'low' ?) lights.
1. Only God knows why Kamal had to be a Kathak dancer. I thought he had already proven his expertise in Salangai Oli. So why again? Why not Kuchipudi or Odissi? Wouldn't they have been suitable for the tight plot? May be had he had the time to add a few more scenes, he would've reasoned that it was his Kathak skill that enbled him to make swift moves to kill the terrorists. Damn, that was a huge miss!
2. Of course, the comedy parts (read cheap slapstick *tamashu*) are always to the credit of brahmins. The 'chicken tasting *paapathi* ' had to be there. Otherwise, how could the screenplay work (assuming it did) ? Most brahmins I reckon would believe in the concept of karmic retribution, and I guess we saw how that unfolded even before the movie was released.
3. What was the point in the villain (Rahul Bose?) talking in a sore voice throught the movie? Oh oh ok, it was part of the terrorist *effects*. Man was I scared to death!!! To hell!!! I could hardly understand what he was saying.
4. Sub-title highlights: None of the arabic (or whatever language it was) dialogues were sub-titled, but all English ones were. Poor English-illiterate Tamil audience!!!
5. The wife did not know that there was a basement to their house? Come on, was she blind???? All of us saw the broad pathway leading directly from the road, on to the basement's big shutter gate. Heck, even the cops knew about it and were lying in wait for the hero to come out. How could she've not known?? Oh no she must've been too mesmerized by her husband's dance moves to notice such a trivial thing. Right!
Anyway, can't help wondering how such a dimwit earned a doctorate in nuclear oncology. But hey, she's Kamal's wife so anything's possible.
6. And why the hell didn't the cops go inside the house instead of waiting outside? Ha, cos that's what the clever director of the movie must've asked them to do....Hmm that explains it very clearly!
7. Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't Shekar Kapur also get in to the car? Where did he get lost? The *clever* director focused the camera only on the two women in the car. So that *automatically* explains that he must've been dropped off at the Indian Embassy safely. What you don't see is not there at all!!! After all, aren't we descendants of Ostriches?
8. How, when and where did the car chase end? Poor NYPD could afford to send only two cars?
9. FBI really need to learn a few lessons from Kamal. Otherwise how could they've not know about such terrorist activities on their soil?
10. Nuclear oncology - A highly specialized field of study. But what a pity that no one in the FBI has any idea about it. But thank God, the plot was super-intelligent to make that the wife's field of study. And even greater was her ingenuity - use a simple houshold oven instead of a 'Faraday field'.
11. The best was the ending - 4 superheroes walking majestically!!! The wife says 'Everything's over' - And we heave a sigh of relief. But hey, don't be happy, there is part two - And what follows is another string of incoherent scenes. But that's just the suspense...Watch out!!!
What the hell was this movie about? What was the story? How crappier can the screenplay be?
A scene by scene analysis? No way!!!! So here are the high (or should I say 'low' ?) lights.
1. Only God knows why Kamal had to be a Kathak dancer. I thought he had already proven his expertise in Salangai Oli. So why again? Why not Kuchipudi or Odissi? Wouldn't they have been suitable for the tight plot? May be had he had the time to add a few more scenes, he would've reasoned that it was his Kathak skill that enbled him to make swift moves to kill the terrorists. Damn, that was a huge miss!
2. Of course, the comedy parts (read cheap slapstick *tamashu*) are always to the credit of brahmins. The 'chicken tasting *paapathi* ' had to be there. Otherwise, how could the screenplay work (assuming it did) ? Most brahmins I reckon would believe in the concept of karmic retribution, and I guess we saw how that unfolded even before the movie was released.
3. What was the point in the villain (Rahul Bose?) talking in a sore voice throught the movie? Oh oh ok, it was part of the terrorist *effects*. Man was I scared to death!!! To hell!!! I could hardly understand what he was saying.
4. Sub-title highlights: None of the arabic (or whatever language it was) dialogues were sub-titled, but all English ones were. Poor English-illiterate Tamil audience!!!
5. The wife did not know that there was a basement to their house? Come on, was she blind???? All of us saw the broad pathway leading directly from the road, on to the basement's big shutter gate. Heck, even the cops knew about it and were lying in wait for the hero to come out. How could she've not known?? Oh no she must've been too mesmerized by her husband's dance moves to notice such a trivial thing. Right!
Anyway, can't help wondering how such a dimwit earned a doctorate in nuclear oncology. But hey, she's Kamal's wife so anything's possible.
6. And why the hell didn't the cops go inside the house instead of waiting outside? Ha, cos that's what the clever director of the movie must've asked them to do....Hmm that explains it very clearly!
7. Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't Shekar Kapur also get in to the car? Where did he get lost? The *clever* director focused the camera only on the two women in the car. So that *automatically* explains that he must've been dropped off at the Indian Embassy safely. What you don't see is not there at all!!! After all, aren't we descendants of Ostriches?
8. How, when and where did the car chase end? Poor NYPD could afford to send only two cars?
9. FBI really need to learn a few lessons from Kamal. Otherwise how could they've not know about such terrorist activities on their soil?
10. Nuclear oncology - A highly specialized field of study. But what a pity that no one in the FBI has any idea about it. But thank God, the plot was super-intelligent to make that the wife's field of study. And even greater was her ingenuity - use a simple houshold oven instead of a 'Faraday field'.
11. The best was the ending - 4 superheroes walking majestically!!! The wife says 'Everything's over' - And we heave a sigh of relief. But hey, don't be happy, there is part two - And what follows is another string of incoherent scenes. But that's just the suspense...Watch out!!!
1 comment:
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